I just can't decide under which rock I'm supposed to hide | gothgrrrl's Blog

I'm pretty restless these days. And I just watched a movie about a man who finds out that his son is paedopiliac. And that was just so scary... I mean... what would you do if you found something like that out about your son? Or what do you do if you notice these tendencies? While watching the movie I thought that I couldn't even play someone who's a paedophil because I just get cramps from the image... I don't want children, they get on my nerves but I just can't cope with the thought of someone doing something like that to kids and I wonder... if one is paedophiliac... don't you feel like that anymore? Or do you get disgusted by yourself? Anyway... was quite a shocking movie... Put me out a little...

Today I had two new lectures. Both in Slavic Studies. The first one was nice. The issue is that interesting ... "Methods of the Cultural Studies" but the lecturer is good. He's funny and he's nice and he seems like the sort of person you can cope with. Still resolute... He has a very tender smile and a tender voice and with that smile and that voice he then said: "So what? So you'll write two tests in one day... it's not kindergarten here..." Because it wasn't my problem I found it funny. Not nice, I know. Anyway, I like him. The second... "Eastern Europe on the Internet" has an interesting issue but I don't like the lecturer that much and we have to give oral presentations and I hate that. Well, let's see...

Also, I had my first Russian lesson after the holidays today and you know yesterday I wasn't satisfied with how it had been meeting my lecturer whom I'm sort of crushing on. But today it was just ... great. He has that habit... suddenly after saying something he looks at me and smiles and I love that. I always have to smile too and it brightens everything up. Also I was suprised at how much I still knew... I thought I'd forgotten everything but it was alright... Just when he talks Russian... I don't get the point in 90% of his sentences... I hate that. I can translate from German to Russian moderately well and moderately fast but I just can't translate from that fast Russian he speaks to German... And every time I fail to translate what he says I feel stupid and I hate that...

Anyway. Tomorrow another day. Definitely looking forward to seeing my Russian lecturer again. Not looking forward to having to kill four hours... And Friday I'll see Holger... I'm quite excited about that. :)